My brother used that sentence a lot with me when I first began coaching. I was enthusiastic and wanted to coach everyone all the time. He reminded me that Help is only Helpful if it is Helping.
The words came up in my world this week as I offered a new course called Article Writing With A Book In Mind. The program is for people who are beginning to blog and want to write a book, or have been blogging for a while now and what to do it more purposefully.
It was a great hit, so we did a repeat. With only four spaces left I was sure that we would fill up the course as we typically do. What happened was amazing to me, and left me wondering how often I do this type of thing. Before I get to the juicy part, I want to share a little background first.
We have now sold 4 of the 8 slots available, but what about the 5th slot. I had a intuitive “hit” that one more person would greatly benefit if they could have their questions answered. I heard and obeyed the intuition by opening up the second class. I believe everything happens for a reason. With that being said, I’m only reporting an observation, not a judgment. I find it intriguing though I hope you will too.
I presented a second teleclass offering a three step process to help people understand if this program was right for them, and the steps we will take in getting them the rest of the way through the process of discovery. Specifically, I offer them a template to discover if they are truly ready to move forward with the idea of Article Writing With A Book In Mind. I also share with my listeners how having poor writing habits, or dyslexia is no excuse for not writing. There is a whole community of people who are more than willing to critique our work. These beautiful people are helpful with grammer, syntax, punctuation, and of course spelling (left in for their enjoyment.)
Now on with the juicy part of this story.
A lovely friend and dear colleague was “offering her support” as she came to the class. During the question and answer period she dominated the space. I “heard my small still voice say ” there was someone wanting to ask a question, but when I asked no one replied. Her questions were appropriate and she was truly curious. She sincerely wants to be of support and understand what we are offering. She later told me because she wanted to “share it with those who might benefit.” Of course this is always appreciated, but still I could hear a faint voice in the back of my mind, “someone else has a question”.
I continued to ask, “are there any more questions?” Again this dear friend popped up with another set of questions, then others joined in. It was lovely and I enjoyed it greatly.
After the call though I just had a feeling someone had a question that didn’t get answered, the feeling got heavy and nagging. I was not sure who or what question, but the statement came into mind “Help is only Helpful if it is Helping”. I began to wonder about people coming to the class to be of “support” if they really are being supportive. Though I will never know if an opportunity was missed it made be think about the times I have shown up to classes to be of support to others. This is a practice I am removing from my “business as usual” program, unless I’m asked to either evaluate, come to support, or I’ve been asked to demonstrate, give testimony to, or if I’m truly interested in the product. I see how it might not always be helpful for me as a way to contribute to others process.
All worked out well though, the question finally came through in an e-mail later that day. Whew!
But this experience definitely taught me something about how to help in helpful ways, once again my hat is off to you brother dear!